Queen Mary

Published in Allure

The first lady of hip-hop soul, Mary J. Blige, taps her fame and her pocketbook to help women in need as she prepares for what could be the role of a lifetime.

True divas are hard to come by. That doesn't just mean stars who behave like spoiled brats, demanding green M&M's or chucking their phones at assistants. A true diva is a woman who “works really hard,” says Mary J. Blige. “She doesn't let anybody get in the way. Divas do what they need to be satisfied.” After a nearly two-decade music career spent pioneering a new genre (hip-hop soul) and winning nine Grammys, Blige knows a thing or two about the subject—even though she sometimes calls herself “Plain Ol' Mary.”

Initially, “plain ol' Mary” seems like a blatant misnomer. Her personal style, with those fur-lined boots, chunky gold jewelry, and tight white pants, is joyously over-the-top. She wears orange python-print four-inch heels to lunch and never once removes the oversize sunglasses she designed herself. She compares her onstage persona to “Jordan playing basketball.” And sometimes she slips into talking about herself in the third person: Mary this and Mary that.

But occasionally, plain ol' Mary surfaces. Blige lives in New Jersey with her husband and manager, Kendu Isaacs, and two children, and her family life sounds like that of any suburban mom, filled with trips to the mall, the movie theater, and the grocery store. At home, she's a long way from stilettos. “I sleep in a T-shirt, not all the lingerie people would think I have,” she says.

Blige's influence on hip-hop cannot be overstated. She paved the way for the Lauryn Hills and Rihannas of the world with her first album, produced by Diddy, in 1992. Still, she doesn't wish she could have skyrocketed to fame like the American Idol contestants she saw as a guest judge this season. “They're not seasoned,” she says. Referring to herself and her peers, she says, “We went through the trenches, which is why we're still here. I call it rotisserie versus microwave chicken. The rotisserie, you season it, let it marinate in your fridge overnight, then you put it in the oven. The microwave chicken, you buy it frozen, and nine minutes later, you have a meal. Do you really want to eat that? I'd rather be the rotisserie.”

Blige is also taking the slow and steady route with her screen career, by extensively prepping for her next role after appearances in 30 Rock, Entourage, and I Can Do Bad All By Myself.She'll play mentally ill jazz singer Nina Simone in the 2012 movie Nina. Filming begins this month, and she's been hard at work with French lessons and acting classes until she feels as if she's “living in Nina-land.” The only part of the process that makes Blige apprehensive is excavating her own painful past to play the tortured singer: “We have almost the same life. For a long time, I felt about myself how she felt about herself—we go really, really dark. I was never diagnosed as a manic-depressive, but who knows, maybe I should have been. I have to go back and be that dark Mary again to bring Nina to life, use it for the character, and then come out. There's way too much at stake to stay there.” Blige will draw on her memories of growing up in Yonkers, New York, watching women be badly abused around her, and then falling into a destructive relationship herself in her 20s, with K-Ci Hailey of Jodeci. She dropped out of high school (later earning a GED), and despite her considerable success, she spent years struggling with drugs, alcohol abuse, and depression.

“I came out the other side,” blige says, so she's made it her mission to help other women who are still struggling. “After what I grew up on, I vowed not to see a woman hurt again.” She recently helped open a women's center in Yonkers that offers GED classes, babysitting, and job preparation. She also cofounded the Foundation for the Advancement of Women Now, which supports women's career development, self-esteem, and education through scholarships. This year, Blige made another vow: to donate one dollar from each purchase of her new fragrance, My Life, to the foundation. “My Life was the name of the album that started my women's-empowerment movement,” she says, “so I wanted to make [this fragrance] for women.” Known for wearing her heart on her sleeve no matter what she's going through, Blige asked that the perfume come in a heart-shaped bottle. “So many women are all heart,” she says. And in her case, also a little grit.

“All I really want is to be happy,” blige sang on her 1994 album, My Life. So, more than 15 turbulent years later, has she gotten her wish? “I'm definitely happier than I was,” she says. “I love myself more than I did.” Maybe that's why on her most recent album, Stronger With Each Tear, she moved on to songs such as “I Feel Good,” in which she sings, “Don't you try to bring me down/ Though it's not like you could.” Even with all that bravado, Blige's vulnerability still comes through. Could be that Plain Ol' Mary and the hip-hop diva aren't so different after all.

LIFE IN A BOTTLE

Mary J. Blige partnered with Carol's Daughter to create My Life, a fragrance with notes of gardenia, pear, freesia, and sesame. “It's the epitome of a confident woman,” says Blige. The $55 fragrance will be available exclusively through HSN starting July 31. One dollar from each purchase will be donated to the Foundation for the Advancement of Women Now, a charity cofounded by Blige.

WHAT MARY LOVES

BEAUTY ICONS Iman, Naomi Campbell, Charlize Theron. “Some people glide into a room like they're on skates. I walk.”

GUILTY PLEASURE Naps. “I'll put on a Western, turn the volume down low, pull the covers up, and take a five-hour nap.”

HAIRSTYLE “The blonde bob I first saw on Salt-n-Pepa in the ‘Shake Your Thang’ video. I went blonde right after that, and all the boys were recognizing me all of a sudden.”

VACATION SPOT Cabo. “I love the sun, and I get really dark. I can't swim laps, but I can go in the water and play around.”

NAIL POLISH Essie's purple-gray Island Hopping. “It's loud enough without being hot pink.”

FOOD Liver and onions. “My mom used to cook it for me.”

TV SHOW Nip/Tuck. “There's a lot of drama. [And it] definitely makes you nervous about plastic surgery.”

ALBUM Ask Rufus by Chaka Khan. “I bring it with me every time I go away.”

DESSERT Candy bars. “I don't like dark, bitter chocolate; that's a waste of time. I want a Snickers! A Twix! Golden Oreos!”